Systemic coaching

Assignment Stepping stones.

Objective: map out the steps you need to take to reach your goal

Needed: A4 paper and markers; space

Work in pairs. One works on the clarification of their actions, the other one coaches this process. After the assignment, the pairs switch.

  1. Formulate the goal you want to accomplish in one sentence. The coach writes down the goal (if needed) and writes down a key word on a piece of paper.
  2. Place the paper as far away from you as feels right.
  3. Stand opposite your goal and name the first action needed to reach that goal. The coach writes this down and places the paper on the floor in front of you. Step on it.
  4. You now name the next action needed to reach your goal. When you take the step to this action, make sure that this is an achievable step for you.
  5. If you hit a wall, you might need to take an extra step. Consult with your coach if you need extra help or if a smaller step will suffice. Hesitation, resistance or getting stuck are very informative. They will help you mark out a boundary that needs thorough exploring. To deny or ignore doubt will eventually work against you. Taking forced steps will have an effect on the energy you feel throughout the process. The coach can help you by pointing out your nonverbal reactions.
  6. Look how far you can get towards your goal. Most of the time you will not reach your goal. Your ability to visualize is often not sufficient and/or your goal is too far away. But there are several roads that you can take and the context and effort all influence what will be achievable when and what won’t be.

It is important that your goal is right for you and that you start moving towards your goal with confidence.

Short bio

I am a senior lecturer at Hanze University of Applied Sciences,  at the school of Business, department Human Resource Management, the part time education, since 2000. Before that I worked 22 years in various government companies as a human resource manager. I have my own practice  Apsara. I work there as coach, grief counsellor, healer and with meditation and the principles of organisational constellations like systemic coaching. I have been working with systemic coaching with clients and with students for several years. Due to losses in my personal life I became interested in grief and grief at work in 2000. I have worked with this subject with parents but also with managers in various companies and with my part-time students.



Titia Mulder Praktijk Apsara
Willem Plojterlaan 7
9766PL Eelderwolde.
050 3095591